speechless

im sick so i stayed home, and my "mother" just told me, "tmr if you wake up late again then you know." , implying tht i stayed home today not because i was sick but tht i overslept and thus pretended to be sick to stay home. What kind of a mother is she?

In my defense, i fairly screamed at her tht i woke up okay, walao. And now my throat hurts again when it was recovering just now. The bitch. Like i took all those pills cos i was pretending. Like you can pretend to blow your nose. Like you can produce mucus on purpose. Gross.

I look down on her. What a disgusting excuse for a human being.

The nxt time im sick im totally gonna storm into her room and slam open the door and say tht "look, im awake but im sick and gonna stay home and contrary to wht you think im not oversleeping and thus pretending". Tht sounds weak, but against this kind of person tht's the best i can do. She thinks she's the only one who can be sick and stay home from work. She thinks im pretending when im sick. i hate her so much i dont even hv words.

you know things are bad when the only thing tht calms you down is putting a bullet through her head.

Yes, if i ever kill her one can come here to my blog and see my confession. Excepr that i wldnt want to ruin my life over her, that vile, revolting person. She's not worth the rest of my life. Thus i'll not kill her, so if she's murdered one day, it wont be by me, cos she makes ppl hate her really easily. Ask around, im sure you'll find many. She's just detestable.

I dont understand why i need to put up w her. Why cant someone else deal w her? I didnt choose this family. we give new meaning to dysfunctional. I want to escape so bad, but killing myself for her is SO not worth it. Thus i hv the fantasies of killing her. But i dont even want to touch her, she repulses me tht much.

I mean, i understand why she thinks im pretending. Cos im awake at this time doing my work. and i used to pretend back in sec sch. But she doesnt know tht i was so tired today and hv slept half the day away in the morn and in sec sch i nvr took responsibility for anth. Now in poly i fully do, and unlike her i actually vare abt my work. Its not like i can refrain from having a fever and sleeping. And yes, i do hv a mild fever, i took my temperature. Tht cow. Of cos if i slept half the day away i need to do work now, esp since i slept again at 9pm. And yes, i told her i was gg to sch tmr, which makes her increase her certainty tht im pretending. But she doesnt know tht i HAVE to go, does she? I need to consult wilson abt evening wear so i can start inking and colouring for monday's submission. I alr missed today, if i miss tmr too i wont be able to hand in. Also, i need to go collect swatched fr wilson. And there's presentation for commdi on monday, i need to discuss w my grp, i alr ps-ed them today. But no, i didnt tell her all these, cos she doesnt bother to ak, so i dont bother to tell her, either. Dealing w her is so much less painful when there is no talking. Yes, i hv issues, bt its all thanks to her.

I feel like crap. Worse than. My body feels hot and breathing is weird. i want nothing more than to sleep, again, and to stay home frm sch tmr again, w an mc this time, but i cant. I really need to go to sch. And to do tht i need to finish colouring my career wear for submission tmr.

Do you know tht part of the reason i didnt go get mc today is tht i dont trsut doctors, and also i wanted to help her save money? I dont see the pt of gg to a doctor who will tell you you're sick when you alr know you are, and give you meds for it when you alr hv panadol flumax at home. But no, i fully intend to spend this money nxt time, cos she's not worth my concern.



*for those who dont alr know, yes, i hate my mother, and i admit it. But before you give me a disgusted look and judge me for tht, ask yourself if you know abt me and my life. Im pretty sure you dont, so dont go telling me tht i shd give her a chance and talk to her. You're not the one who lives w her, i think i know her better than you do. Just because you lucky bitches hv a gd relationship w ur mums does nt mean everyone else does. Trust me, no one else wishes to nt hv this type of r'ship than i do.