i am so touched now! very emotional, must be PMS. LOL!
this is a kinda long post dedicated to my bffs! if u arent 1 of them or arent interested, skip ahead to the next post thankyou!
okay u guys realise my last few posts all got stuff abt my frens & how i love them? that's cos recently i realised i love my frens more than anth in this world! eek, i risk sounding super mushy and whatever, but i still wana say this.
nobody really knows how my family life is like, but that's also really cos i nvr let them in. during p6 i wanted to tell qiu lin, betty and qh, but in the end i didnt. up til now the only ppl who do know are less than five and they dont know the whole story too.
i dunno why i hide it, there's nth wrong abt it, i just dont feel inclined to let the whole world be privy to my family life i guess. but anyway, my family is really fragmented, with family grudges and all, and im single, so the most impt ppl to me are my dear friends.
i nvr really told them, or anyone at all, because i always thot my one true bestie just hadnt come into my life yet, and maybe that's true but now i realise maybe they've been here all along, not as one person, but a whole group of ppl, each like a diff part of my dream bestie.
its cool, i got JC to go gymming with me whenever i want, the whole grp to go shopping with me, yiyin to gossip with abt things in sch, actually yiyin to gossip abt anth, cos we both kinda gossip quite alot. hmm. i've got betty to lend a ear whenever i need her (and there hv been many times when she'll be on the other end of the phone while i tell her whats wrong, & she's nvr hung up on me, or said she had smth more impt to do, even when im in floods and cant pronounce anth properly) and then for everyday mundane life, there's qh to make it less mundane & a little bit more girly. like when we both didnt hv dates in our sec1 year on valentine's day, we spent the day tgt and it rocked.
of course, there are disappointments and arguments, and manymany troubles along the way. like, qh and betty are always late and standing me up. we always fight and they let me down but hey, we always make up. and there was the whole i-dont-like-you-much episodes with yiyin, juanne and me caught in the middle. im sorry if im blunt, but its the truth. and i rmb very clearly last year when i was trying to talk JC into a better guest list for his bday party with the band. i was so sure the girls wldnt click, but it turned out great. just goes to show u nvr really know anth until u do. i mean, just a few mths ago betty left me alone in dance, and qh made me cry, and then there was the huge fallout almost half a yr ago now which devastated me. and all those times i thought they didnt care. but look at us now, we're still tgt, and we're still friends. we've weathered rumours, gossip, fights, disputes, disagreements, parental interference...crap, im getting really emotional. bleh. but my point is, thru thick & thin, we've been there for each other, & i really hope we'll continue to be forever.
here's an short passage from my pen&paper diary entry on tuesday:
hmm, nxt yr is my 10 yr anniversary with some of my frens, like juanne & JC. a decade-long friendship! yay. Jiacai & Grace & Juanne. who else ar? hmm cant rmb. for some its a long time away, eg qh, kenneth & i hv more than 6yrs to go, & yiyin being the latest addition to our group, will be our fren for 10 yrs when we're 22yrs old! its a long time away, but we can make it. see, this is our family away from family, kinda. (ahem, here i start listing who i met 1st and all, not impt, lets skip this part) i think this is all fated, u noe? i mean, how cool is it that i got into cedar sec (which i wld hv been in with qiulin) but i appealed to anderson? maybe my psychic powers were telling me there was someone i hv to meet there. so anw, on 29 March 2005 i introduced yiyin to the group, & we've nvr looked back since. ok that's a bit of an exaggeration. there was alot of friction, actually, but we're all cool now. mostly. i dont ever wana lose them, u noe? they are my best friends, cos they nvr waver (well, most of them) seriosuly? w/o them, my life wld suck real bad. ok, so maybe sumtyms they are e ones who make my life like hell, but whatever. i kinda feel like we're a mini version of FRIENDS, the popular tv show. mini cos we dont broadcast our frenship to viewers worldwide :D woot, im happy with what i've got. & if all isnt perfect? hey, its the rough edges that make us who we are. Best friends, always friends, best friends forever!LOL isnt it totally cool that i was thinking tht on tuesday, then yesterday JC appeared to be thinking along the same lines? haha.
now to credit these people who have made my life what it is now! *drumroll*
first and foremost,there are the guys, who nvr change. names are listed randomly, not in rank.
JiaCai!you hv always been my buddy since pri1, when u used to draw Ju & i pictures from pokemon :D & since then u've always been the person i ask to do whatever i feel like when i've got nth on. we study tgt during exam periods, we do sports tgt, we eat tgt. i dont know what to say except u'll always be a buddy of mine! (even if u do seem to tink im a bit of a bimbo who only looks at cute guys *rolls eyes*)
Kenneth Teng!our friendship started when the rumours of you & Ju did. haha, its true. & since then, ur parties hv been almost like a tradition in our yearly activities. every year there's always smth u & ur family start organizing! which is cool. & u're the fren who's always nice & nvr really loses his temper with us. & i rmb last yr-end hols whenever i was bored i'll just sms u, then u, me & JC wld go out. its reli funny, u're like the never-changing dude in our group. sure, ur hobbies vary, but ur personality remains the same! its reli nice to know when everything changes, some things nvr do. & u nvr reli hv anth acidic to say abt others. i hope we stay like this always man!
Justin!u're a weird dude man, u are so techno-gadgetty! we nvr knew each other reli well til WITs, & then was when i reli got to noe u! allow me to say that while i still tink u're kinda weird, its in a totally cool science-dude-of-our-group way! u're like, erm, our own sci-fi specialist or smth. i tink u're reli cool, man, but each time u look at me i cant help tinking, hey, does he like look scared of me or smth. dont tink of me as a ticking time bomb who'll go off anytime man! so rmb, when i say u're weird, its in a nice way okay? so friend, stay weird, and stay my friend! Kidz Impact forver!
omg, reli long post alr, i'll just say the names who'll always be my frens.
Pocheng, u drove me nuts when we 1st met & u still do sometimes!
Ian, u're the computer guy man! rmb Kidz Impact always!
YanLiang, Marcus, Reuben: we dont hang out much, but i wont 4get u guys lah. im very nice de. LOL.
and now the dudettes.
QH!we dont need words to describe our frenship, girl! u know it & i know it, we'll be frens forever & ever, even when we see each other so little!
Betty!same goes for you, forever frens! thanks for all the times u've been there for me, & listen, i'll be here for you too whenever u need me, ok? i noe u're reli close w ur sec sch frens, but nvr forget abt us okay.
Alicia!whenever i need a favour from you, you nvr let me down! u're a great friend, rmb our crazy 5566 times tgt 4evr! i'll always rmb when we went to each other's houses so many times, & our Kidz Impact time tgt rocked. hope to cya soon!
Juanne!omg, Ju, rmb how we were both monitress in p1? & how we always fought? so funny when i tink of it now. we had our share of catfights, and we had our crazy fun times tgt too. u're a Kidz Impact member forevr ok! cya soon babe!
QiuLin!we became gd frens only in p6 right? look how far we've come! im sure we both thot we were the ones who wldnt last aft pri sch, but we did! i can still rmb all the crazy fun times we've shared, i hope u do too. u're our sweet kid, say u'll be my fren forevr!
and finally, there's our new addition to the 'family', since 2005.
YiYin!oh no, there's so much we can say abt our friendsip lah. some can say we're best friends, others can say we're not really friends, but both can be said at different times of our roller-coaster relationship lah. 1st we were 'fake' frens in sec1, hanging out w each other but not really liking each other. then we were buds in sec2, which was really thanks to JC's party. then we drifted apart again, and i cant really say we've clicked tgt again. i dont know what to say abt us, but in the past, i realised we had a really rocky reltionship going. you hurt me, so i hurt you back, and this was a vicious cycle that i really hated. and its really crazy. im sure u've hated me so much u wished u didnt hv me as ur fren at all b4, & i can safely say i've felt the same way. but then each time i think my life wld be so much simpler w/o you, i rmb some superfun, super crazy time that we've had, & im like, do i really wish i nvr experienced that? the answer's no, btw. that's why its crazy, i hate you, then i love you, then i dont know what's happening between us. we nvr seem to click in front of others, but i dunno, its like, when alone, its not difficult to. its nuts. but hey, love you or not, i still wana be ur friend forever okay.
and that about wraps up everything. u noe, i rmb a conversation i had w kanika not so long ago. i was saying that i was feeling like lost, cos i hv frens everywhere. like, every1's my fren, but every1's got a grp of their own, & im the only one skipping from one to another, & its not much fun. but now i know tht's only cause i've alrdy GOT a group, and all their names are above. i treasure them all, & i'll treasure them forever.
yay ok i can stop being mushy now :D
&maybe someday i'll tell them, or maybe not. sorry if i've forgotten anyone!
that dark part on my chin and shirt is a shadow of my hp. haha.
& that abt says it all for her. hahahah.
me trying out the lighting, which looked super orange til i edited it w my amatuer skills.
only pics of JC, Yiyin and i cos they were on either side of me. aft tht we changed places but i was too frozen to bother abt pictures alr :D
see, super orange glow, even after editing. bright eyes! ^^
random photo of yiyin at vivo the other day.
omg, looks too white now. nvm lah, there like winter wonderland lidat anyway X)
& then aft this i was told to stop zi lian-ing. LOL.
